Month: August 2023

Two peanuts walked down the street. One was assalted

Mum cooks an omelette, Dad says “These are egg-selent”

We were having burritos, Dad says “I’m wrapped”

Dad: Can you pass the henway? Me: What’s a henway? Dad: About a kilo.

My friends butler lost his left arm- serves him right.

He drove his expensive car into a tree and found out how the Mercedes bends.

Looking for the cheese grater. I asked Dad if we had one. He says “No but it would be great if we did”

What was Beethoven’s favourite fruit? Ba-na-na-na, Ba-na-na-na (to the tune of Symphony 5)

At the play ground, two kids throwing bark chips at each other, one kid get’s hit in the head and starts to cry. Dad says “see, his bark is worse than his bite”

Me: I’m off… Dad:I wondered what that smell was