Month: August 2026

I don’t mean to brag but my bank just sent me an email saying that I am outstanding!!..

Why do the French eat snails? Cause they don’t like fast food…

Went on cruise and the Captain informed me that I could drink as much alcohol I liked……..just don’t go overboard.

To the bloke that invented zero, thanks for nothing pal

I was thinking of having a pear earlier……….. but I decided to have just one…..

I Phoned the local council today to ask if i could have a skip outside my house……. they said i could do cartwheels round the block for all they cared.

My doctor told me to watch my drinking. So I’m off to find a bar with a mirror!

Why didn’t the worm ever go out? Because he was boring…

Taxi drivers should never accept a fare from a woman named Catherine; they could be arrested for driving while in-taxi-kated.

I said to the wife “lets go buy some calendars” she said in reply “its a date”