Dad Joke: 798

Did you hear about the apathetic rabbit? He doesn’t carrot all.

Dad Joke: 797

An actor and an actress were reported missing the other day. Police say it was out of character for both.

Dad Joke: 796

My wife said that she’s leaving me because of my obsession with cats. She’s kicking meeeoowt.

Dad Joke: 795

Why are Venetian blinds the greatest invention in the history of mankind? If it wasn’t for Venetian blinds, it would have been curtains for all of us.

Dad Joke: 794

Have you heard about the latest diet craze? Six cloves of garlic for breakfast, six onions for lunch, and another 6 cloves of garlic (crushed) for dinner. Hey, it won’t help you lose weight, but you’ll look oh so much slimmer from a distance!! 🙂

Dad Joke: 793

I couldn’t quite remember how to throw a boomerang, but eventually it came back to me.

Dad Joke: 792

Someone just threw sodium chloride at me. That’s a salt.

Dad Joke: 791

A monastery decided to start a fish and chips store. When the store opened, a client comes in, and asks one of the clerics: are you the fish friar? Oh, no, the cleric answers, I’m the chip monk!

Dad Joke: 790

I’ve just sold some glass rockets to Kim Jong Un. I hope he is pleased with his new, clear weapons.

Dad Joke: 789

What did the guitar say to its strings? Stay tuned.