A buddy of mine works in an office where a computer going down causes quite an inconvenience. Recently, one of the computers not only crashed, it made a noise that sounded like a heart monitor. “This computer has flat-lined!” a co-worker called out with mock horror. “Does anyone here know how to do mouse-to-mouse?”
What do you call a Greek parachutist? Con Descending.
How do you tell a kebab to be quiet? Shhhhh Kebab!
A Dad Jokes expert was locked into a dark closet, and told he would not be released until he made up a pun about the situation. He immediately shouted, “Oh, pun the door!”
How many ears does Davy Crockett have? He has a left ear, a right ear, and a Frontier!
Quasimodo goes to a doctor for his annual checkup. “I think something is wrong with your back,” the doctor says. “What makes you say that?” Quasimodo asks. “I don’t know,” the doctor replies. “It’s just a hunch.”
Why did the king go to the dentist? To get his teeth crowned.
On the tram there is a sign that says: “Please vacate these seats for people with disabilities, assistance dogs, seniors and pregnant women.” Why does the dog need a seat?
I’d like to toast the bride, but I don’t want to burn her pretty dress.
Why did the baker hurl an insult at the bread dough? To get a rise out of it.