Author: DJAdmin

How do you get Pikachu onto a bus? You poke him on.

Went to the kitchen shop to buy a whisk. They didn’t have any. I asked why and the assistant told me; “Haven’t you heard of our no whisk guarantee?”

What has a heart but always leaves? An artichoke.

My boss said to me, “you’re the worst train driver ever. How many have you derailed this year?” I said, “I’m not sure; it’s hard to keep track.”

Who married Mississippi? Mr. Sippi.

I’m so good at sleep I can do it with my eyes closed

What do you carry a load of plankton in? A whalebarrow!

Just got sacked from my job as a dishwasher. I kept putting the plates and bowls in the wrong order. The boss reckons I am dishlexic.

I just went down to Coles and swapped 50 raisins for 100 saltantas. I can’t believe the currant exchange rate.

I just finished a job interview with a construction company. I think I totally nailed it!