Author: DJAdmin

Best present this year was a broken drum. You can’t beat that!

Big sale on rowing paddles at my local shop. It’s quite an oar deal.

Who sits in a tractor shouting, ‘The end is nigh!’? Farmer Geddon

I’ve just been to see a play where the entire cast were suspended by ropes above the surface of the stage. I must congratulate them on a flawless performance.

When i was young, I was pretty rebellious. As a result, I wouldn’t take orders from anyone. That’s why I lost my first job as a waiter.

It’s hard to say what my wife does for a living. She sells sea shells on the sea shore.

When my wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo I had to put my foot down.

I’ve got an annoying habit of quoting Elton John lyrics. I hope you don’t mind. I hope you don’t mind.

What did the dog say when he sat on sandpaper…………ruff!!!

I like to spend lunchtime playing chess with the old men in the park although sometimes it’s hard to find 32 of them.