Author: DJAdmin

My doctor told me to watch my drinking. So I’m off to find a bar with a mirror!

Why didn’t the worm ever go out? Because he was boring…

Taxi drivers should never accept a fare from a woman named Catherine; they could be arrested for driving while in-taxi-kated.

I said to the wife “lets go buy some calendars” she said in reply “its a date”

The soldier with no hair will stand baldly for his country!

My mate just went on a great holiday in Weymouth! In Dorset? Yes he really recommends it!

Yesterday I witnessed 2 kids being pulled over by police, one was drinking battery acid the other fireworks. I believe they have charged one and let the there kid off.

A chicken spotted another chicken on the other side of the road and yelled out “hey you …how did you get on the other side of the road?” The other chicken replied “you idiot you ARE on the other side of the road!”

My daughter wanted a pet spider but they were $90 at the pet shop. I think I will just get one of the web!

Last night I dreamt I ate a giant marshmallow. When I woke up, my pillow was gone!