A man gasping of thirst in the desert sees a trio of brightly coloured tents. He goes to the first to beg for water, sorry sir the occupant says we only have custard. The thirsty man goes to tent numbers two and asks for water. Sorry sir only have jello ( or jelly). Oh said the man and heads to tent 3. Water water he demands, but the owner has only cream and fruit. This is odd said the man, yes sir said the man in tent it’s a trifle bazaar
How do ask for an Orange in Mandarin?
A teddy bear is working on a building site. He goes for a tea break and when he returns he notices his pick has been stolen. The bear is angry and reports the theft to the foreman. The foreman grins at the bear and says “Oh, I forgot to tell you, today’s the day the teddy bears have their pick nicked.”
When kissing flowers, tulips are better than one.
I’ve discovered a formula for invisibility. All I need to do now is find the piece of paper I wrote it on
A bear walks into a pub. The Barman asks the bear “What will it be” The Bear says “I’ll have a bourbon.. …… … …. …… …… “and coke” Barman “Why the big pause” Bear (holding up his paws) “I’ve had these all my life”
My daughter’s hamster escaped from its cage last night so I spent 4 hours looking for it. No luck though, he definitely wasn’t in the pub.
today i laugh in the faces of all those people who mocked me when i told them i was going to design a cloak of invisibility….if only they could see me now!!
Cause havoc on The Voice by performing the Ace of Base classic Don’t Turn Around.
Why are there no pain killers in the jungle? Because parrots-eat-em-all…